Log in

Bored; so I post


My boyfriend had to go to the northern regions to inspect the projects in the area. So I haven't seen him in tow days and I miss him. We've chatted a bit at night or a little bit at work whenever he found a wi-fi connection, lol
But it's not the same.
He should be arriving today and maybe showing up at work today after lunch, I can hardly wait :)
I really do love him lots. Crazy, huh?

Anyway, we've planned the weekend for us. Today I'll sleep over at his place and tomorrow he's coming to mine ^^
I baked him peanut butter cupcakes last night. First time trying out that recipe, but it seems to have worked very nicely, even though I eyeballed most of the quantities, lol
I think I'm getting pretty good at baking and whatnot XD

Gah, I don't know what else to do to keep busy!


I know I've been suspiciously silent, but I haven't left, honest! I read everything and log in everyday.
It's just that regarding my personal life...I wanted to see how things played out before telling you guys about it and...for once in my life, it played out well.
I have a boyfriend now :)
And we're both terribly in love, it's amazing how well we seem to fit each other. Sure, it was stormy at first, the getting together, I mean, cos when I met him, he had a girlfriend whom he didn't love and didn't even like anymore. We were attracted to each other since almost he arrived at the agency (yes, we work together!)
So we see each other everyday, lol
Officially, we've been together less than three weeks and it's been wonderful. We date, we hang out, we work together no problem, we even went out of town together; and he's coming over to my place tomorrow to watch a movie (Monty Python's Holy Grail; he knows the Pythons, but he's never seen it) and eat cookies (he loves my baking!)
We just love spending time together, he's amazing and truly cares about me.

I feel a bit overwhelmed sometimes; I mean, I've been alone all my life (and I'm almost 30...) and it's like...like life suddenly paid me back. In spades. I mean, he's truly wonderful and such a good person and i love caring about him and I'm really in love!
I'm so happy, this is so surreal, but seems so real at the same time.
I hope we're made to last, but I have a strange good feeling about this.

Hi, world

And everybody (or rather, I) have discovered that not only I *do* have feelings, I'm actually quite nice and mushy inside...

Life, oh, life...

Ugh, I haven't updated in forever, hahaha
Some things have happened lately.
MAJOR things.
Nothing bad, though, all good! It's just that I'm not at liberty of talking about it yet, sorry ^^;;
But as things progress, I'm sure I'll be able to talk about it soon and then you'll all know I'm fine...in fact, finer than I've been in what seems like forever.


On self-harm

I saw some recent pics of Miley Cyrus, supposedly showing that she's into cutting now.
They look legit.
If so, all I can say is I know that feel, bro.
I used to cut myself as well. It's a way to cope with pain and anxiety, I suppose. Like, it gets so bad at some point, you just wanna feel a different sort of pain so that your own anguish won't consume you anymore. It felt...good? I can't explain, tbh.
The worst part is that, even though I stopped cutting (and wish I never had in the first place) you never get over your problems. I mean, I guess at some point you can sorta establish yourself a decent life and get therapy, but anxiety is reaaaally hard to grow out of.
I don't think I'd do it again, though. Sometimes I have felt really bad and I look at the box cutter with greedy eyes, but I couldn't bring myself to do that again. I tried once, and I couldn't go through with it, lol
I'm surprised she showed those marks willy-nilly. To this day, though I have only the scars, I try to wear long sleeves as much as possible.

30 day lolita challenge, day 5!

Day 5 – 10 items from your wishlist.

It is literally easier for a camel to go through the flaming eye of a needle, than for me to ever fit into/afford brand, so I don't keep a wishlist. BUT IF I DID, this'd be it, I suppose:

1) Baby's Marie Antoinette print JSK in blue.

2) Baby's Princess drop SK in ivory.

3) MM's Antoinette Dress

4) MM's Ekaterina OP

5) MM's Bertille OP

6) MM's Saint Claire OP

7) Baby's Little Red Riding Hood

8) There's an Alice and the pirates ring I've been lusting over for ages. When I was gonna buy it (finally!), it sold out

9) IW Bonnet

10) Baby's crown bag. I love Baby's crown design and I love this bag, but it was too expensive for me T___T

Lolita challenge, day 4!

Ugh, I keep forgetting to do these T__T

Day 4 10 different kinds of food you like.

1) Chicken breast :)

2) Sushi

3) Corn and meat pie (local recipe, delicious!)

4) Cheesecake, in any form, shape, recipe ever.

5) Chicken pot pie, though they don't sell them here and I haven't had it in ages, lol

6) Muffins and cupcakes, I like to bake them myself :)

7) Tea, all kinds! (unless sthey're too strong) 

8) Subs, any

9) Sandwiches, in general (but specially, grilled cheese); they're just so comfortable; I can eat and work at the same time.

10) Thai food :)

30 Day lolita challenge - Day 3

Day 3 – 10 things you hate in lolita.

1) Too much print love! I like looking at pics, I guess, but I miss earlier pieces, when you barely saw prints the likes of AP's or Baby's.

2) Duhhhhrama. Srsly, so dumb. It's like high school all over again, lol

3) Way too sweet OTT prints, with like little animals and things like that that look like 80s Hallmark cards for little girls. LOL, I hope that's clear ^^;;

4) How expensive it is ^^;; It's reaaally hard to move around within a budget, specially cos you fall in love with it and can't stop...

5) On that same vein, I guess I hate that once you start, you tend to feel 'obligated' to be "as loli as you can" like, all the time. I even tried to be the 24/7 loli, with even some lifestyle practices, but really, it's silly to feel so restricted. Do the stuff cos you wanna do them, not cos you feel yoyu need to live to some sort of role. Sometimes I do like to go out in a skimpier outfit or nice casual clothes...

6) And more on that same venue, I hate the phrase "leaving lolita". It's not a sacred sisterhood, it's a fashion. If you wanna wear it once in 5 years cos you felt like it, do it.

7) ...but I gues i'm a hypocrite, cos I hate when girls say they can't do something in lolita, like going to a bar, for instance. Sure, I tend to dress differently when I go to my friend's bar, but I also love going there in lolita. It has a funny effect on people XD

8) How much value is put on owning a lot of brand. That just means you have more money and can spend it, that's it. I value taste a lot more.

9) I hate blouses with skirts. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love them on every other lolita, but I hate them on me, they just don't work on my lumpy, wonky body.

10) I guess I don't hate newbies, but I get annoyed when someone starts making assumptions without proper reasearch. I spent two years researching the style before I started wearing it and though I have evolved from the time I first wore it, I started pretty decent and knowledgeable because of those years spent online and talking to lolita friends :)